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Owing to the Opposition from Sadhus and Sangh Karyakartas, Government Unblocks Porn Sites

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Modi government took a U-turn on porn ban. Owing to the pressure exerted by Sadhus, Sangh Karyakartas and many spiritual saints, government unblocks porn sites. Yogi Adityanath has confirmed that it was on his, Sakshi Maharaj and Mohan Bhagwat’s request that the union government has decided to repeal the ban on porn. Sources say that many senior party leaders including Ram Madhav were opposed to the ban. A compromise was reached between opposing Hindutva groups and Ministry of Information Technology. As per the new deal government will ban porn sighting ‘missionary position’ as it may encourage conversions to Christianity in India.

Last day, Prime Minister Narendra Modi while addressing the nation on radio show तन की बात had said ‘Condom and sanitary pad advertisements promote obscenity and are against our culture, hence shall be banned in the coming days’. That ban will continue as it makes many middle class families largely voters of  Bharatiya Junta Party uncomfortable while watching their dose of daily sops. The policy of ban on sex education framed by past governments will also continue.

Senior leader from Rashtriya Swemsevak Sangh (RSS) called the revoke of ban ‘victory of Sangh morals’. He also requested Karyakartas to continue abusing outspoken women activists, artists and celebrities on twitter and other social media forums. With that happiness returned to Headquarters and many Shakhas of Sangh. After couple of troubled evenings orgasmic nights ahead.

It is also heard that Swami Ramdev is not happy with the decision of revoking ban. As he and his colleague Balakrishan were practicing many Kamasutra positions together to prepare for launch of 100% Shudh Desi Porn by Patanjali Vidyapeeth.

Hindutva Brigade Divided over Porn Ban

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‘Banning porn will encourage homosexuality in RSS’- Mohan Bhagwat

‘Most of the porn on internet is Western. Banning porn is a part of Make in India strategy. I request people to watch B – Grade Hindi movies particularly the ones which have Gajendra Chauhan. We have appointed Gajendra to lead the pioneer Film institute in the country for the simple purpose to mainstream B – Grade movies and encourage budding filmmakers in FTII to make such bold movies. Instead of wasting so much data on watching porn online, I request citizens to visit nearby shady cinema halls and watch B – Grade movies. This will boost our economy significantly and contribute 9% of additional revenue in GDP.’ -said श्री नरेंद्र मोदी on तन की बात. With  that statement of Prime Minister on the radio show, Government of India banned porn couple of days ago.

Renown economist and political analyst Surjit S. Bhalla called it a courageous step to increase domestic pornography tourism in Khujrao. According to him this will also boost the sales of Mastram and Savita Bhabhi. Our sources have informed us that Arun Jaitley, Union Finance Minister, was opposed to the decision. He recommended taxation on porn, which would have increased revenues of Indian state significantly. His recommendations were reflected in 15th Finance Commission report on taxation.

The opinion on porn ban is divided in Hindutva circles.

Rashtriya Sweyamsevak Sangh (RSS) is opposed to the decision. Ram Madhav has written a dissenting note to the Prime Minister. Mohan Bhagwat is also angry over the ban. While speaking to RSS cadre in Nagpur, he said, “banishing porn is not acceptable to Rashtriya Sweyamsevak Sangh. How will the cadres and trainers entertain themselves? Modi Bhakts also are opposed to the decision. So are many elected representatives of BJP in state and national assemblies, who used to watch it to energize themselves during the boring, drowsy sessions of the relevant houses. Banning porn will encourage homosexuality in RSS training camps.”

Swami Ramdev hailed the decision. He announced that the Patanjali Vidyapeeth will produce 100% Shudh Desi porn to fill the vacuum created by the ban.